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The Objectively-Hilarious Edition Thursday, March 21, 2024

These Toddler Games For iPad Are Actually Good — And That’s All Too Rare, by Allison Johnson, The Verge

They’re made by Sago Mini, and every one of its games is just so goddamn cute. Some of them are structured as “play sets,” which are little interactive, open-ended cartoon worlds. Wander through a city or an airport terminal and you’ll find tons of objects to interact with, vehicles to drag and drop, and funny little Easter eggs all over the place. You can adjust the speed of an escalator to send a character flying into a ball pit, and if you open the door to a bathroom stall, you might find a pigeon sitting on the toilet. That’s just objectively hilarious.

Novelty Apps Are Trip Down Memory Lane Worth Taking, by Lucy Hallmark, The Reflector

Novelty apps have a place in today’s world. They may have once been a phenomenon of the early 2010s, but the humor from that age is not entirely lost. Downloading a novelty app is a nostalgic way to remember and honor the past. Whether that remembrance is through the sound of a censoring bleep, a digital fart or a fake beer, it is worth the trip down memory lane.

Apple In Courts

Apple Isn’t Living Up To The Letter Or Spirit Of Court Order In Epic Suit, Meta And Microsoft Say, by Lauren Feiner, The Verge

The amici say that Apple’s 12 to 27 percent fee on external purchases defeats the purpose of the new requirement since it’s only a few percentage points below what developers would otherwise be required to pay for in-app purchases. The external purchase fee could make it unrealistic for developers to even set up an external payments system, given that other transaction costs they might incur through that route could eliminate any of the 3 percent gains they’d get from moving away from Apple’s system. Plus, customers are unlikely to choose the external option if it’s the same price or higher.

What Did Epic Games Say To A Melbourne Judge That Made Apple So Mad?, by John Davidson, AFR

Informing Epic on March 2 that it was unilaterally terminating a software licensing agreement that would have allowed Epic to develop its own app store for iPhones in Europe (a decision Apple later regretted, and reversed), Apple’s lawyers wrote: “Moreover, a recent submission in the Australian litigation suggests that Epic Games Sweden AB is part of a global effort to undermine or evade Apple’s rules.”

“That’s quite an unusual thing to say or seek to leverage off,” said Justice Beach in the Melbourne courtroom, on day three of what is expected to be a 16-week trial.

Tim In Shanghai

Apple CEO Cook Opens New Shanghai Store In Show Of China Commitment, by Bloomberg

Cook emerged from the store at seven pm to thunderous applause from the crowd, shaking hands and hugging fans. His appearance capped a much-publicised jaunt around the financial hub and comes at a delicate time for Apple and its place in the world’s No. two economy.

The wider backdrop to Cook’s outreach includes fraying relations between the US and China, and Beijing’s attempts to assuage foreign investors spooked by regulatory uncertainty.

Tim Cook Flexes His Shanghai Trip On Chinese Social Media Amid Apple's China Crisis, by Hasan Chowdhury, Business Insider

Tim Cook is back in China again. This time, he's chowing down steamed buns on Chinese social media.

The Apple CEO is in Shanghai ahead of the opening of a new Apple store this week — but is making sure he takes the time to share select highlights of his trip to his 1.6 million-plus "fans" on the Chinese app Weibo.

Stuff

Apple's New Manuals, Specs, And Downloads Page Is A Great Resource, by Jason Cross, Macworld

The new Manuals, Specs, and Downloads page will help you find all the info you need for any of the Apple products you own. It’s organized by product category and includes tech specs, user guides, info pages, and repair manuals (when applicable) for Apple products going back decades–even including tech specs for the old iMac G3.

The App Store’s Updated Purchase History, by John Voorhees, MacStories

There are more details on the new page than before, which makes it easier to review past purchases.

Apple Promotes Face ID In New iPhone 15 Ad Called 'Nice Try!', by Joe Rossignol, MacRumors

In the 30-second video ad, an iMessage notification appears on a girl's iPhone 15 placed on a dining table, while she is in another room. Nosy family members attempt to unlock the device to read the message, but Face ID prevents them from doing so.

Notes

AI Is Coming To The iPhone–and It Could Change Everything, by Dan Moren, Macworld

I realize that AI is the current buzzword of the industry, and everything and its cousin is bragging that it’s powered by artificial intelligence these days, but this is where I’m hoping Apple can bring some sanity to the process. There are very legitimate uses for the technology and Apple has the opportunity to come up with ideas that none of us can foresee. That’s one of the places that the company traditionally excels, providing capabilities that seem at once obvious but also provide a potentially huge impact on the way we all interact with our devices.

It’s Time For A New AirPort, by Joe Rosensteel, Six Colors

It seems like a great time for Apple to sell a friendly 6E router.

Bottom of the Page

I don't know about everyone else, but when I was using AirPort Extreme back in the days, I did have quite a few problems with losing internet... So much so that I made a habit of switching off and turning back on the AirPort frequently.

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Thanks for reading.